You may have seen this clever bit explaining differences in gender standards: “If a key can open a bunch of locks, it’s viewed as a master key, and is awesome to have. But if a lock is opened by a lot of different keys, well that’s a pretty shitty lock if you ask me.”

THIS IS WHY I HATE METAPHORS. Or at least when people are shit at using them.

“Penis: shaped like a key.” I’m with you so far. “Vagina: shaped like a lock.” Makes sense. “Therefore, sexism.” I fucking hate you so fucking much.

Also, don’t justify this by saying it’s a joke. It’s a shittier joke than it is a metaphor.

I really love how people with attractive personalities become more physically attractive (to me) the more I get to know them.

Actually I’m surprised I haven’t done it yet considering how rarely I post pictures.

I’ve had 35 followers for a long time now. I don’t like static numbers and I’m obviously not gaining any followers anytime soon, so I feel like I need to piss some of you mother fuckers off.

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Every time I think about saying some social commentary I realize that’s probably the fastest way in the world to make everybody hate you, including dead baby jokes.

eltigrechico: iknoright? Not to be a dick, but wasn’t that kinda the whole premise of donating to the Ron Paul campaign?

eltigrechico:

iknoright?

Not to be a dick, but wasn’t that kinda the whole premise of donating to the Ron Paul campaign?

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(Source: gaypher)

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Yeah, I’d say I’m a fan…… Is that what the fandom is? Guess not.
Me, too many times to seem real.

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(Source: a-timelord)

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I wrote a haiku

leslie-crusher:

I hate group projects
just let me do it myself
everyone else sucks

(Source: lesliecrusher)

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(Source: robotindisguise)

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(Source: orangeninjadan)

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